[Slow piano music begins] [Veda Moore] VEDA. V. Victorious over adversities. E. Enduring multiple challenges such as HIV, stopping drug use, surviving COVID, healing relationships, and now living with Stage 4 cancer. D. Daughter of Pauline and William, sister to Leslie and William Bundy. Mother of three, grandmother of four, and great grandmother of one. A. Achiever of things never thought possible such as my AA degree and assisting to have the law passed for CHWs to be certified. Veda Moore. That’s me. I love helping people to be free. [Slow piano music fades] [Veda Moore] I’m Veda Moore, and we’re here at STAR (Sisters Together And Reaching). I met Reverend Hickman here because I’m HIV-positive, and STAR has a support group which I used to go to around 2000. At age 11, I was molested and raped. I didn’t wanna be seen. I never wore makeup because I never wanted to draw attention to myself. And— I always wanted to be light skinned, have light eyes, and be bowlegged. I started using drugs at around that time and did that off and on for a lot of my life. I have three children, and during my addiction, I was a good mom for a little while. I was using drugs off and on, and then around ‘97, ‘98, I got really tired of living like that. It didn’t happen overnight, but over time. When I found out I was positive, I kept missing work. I was blacking out. I couldn’t go outside when it was really hot, or I would faint. I would get in arguments, and I would black out. I thought it was from the drugs, but I got a phone call, and this doctor told me over the phone that I was positive. I didn’t know how to internalize that. I guess because of the way my face was looking, my son asked, “Ma, what’s wrong?” I told them; I let my children know. I wanted to kill the guy that gave it to me. I didn’t use intravenously, so I contracted it through sexual contact with him. I was still in the house with him, and there was just a lot going on. I went through all kinds of emotions. Hating myself and always thinking I was ugly from such a young age added to everything, so there was more stuff stuffed down. I was still getting high, but I was fed up with it. I didn’t want to get high no more, and I tried to stop on my own. I had a stroke trying to quit. At the hospital, a social worker asked me if I got high. They had done bloodwork and urine—she knew I got high. But she wanted to see how I was gonna respond to it. Out of my mouth came, “Yeah, I get high.” She said, “If I get you a bed, will you go on a detox?” And I said, “Yeah.” I used from the age of 11 until then. I was 45. So, I went home and thought about it. I told the boys that I was working for that I was going into treatment. They told me, “ You go ahead. Yeah, you need some help. We’ll make sure your kids eat every day and that they go to school. We’ll make sure they do everything they supposed to do.” After the treatment, the doctors sent me to 911 which is an aftercare program for addicts. I met some really nice people in there. I learned to not leave my house without a plan. We would just go to meetings, and then whoever had food stamps would go to the market and treat everybody to a sandwich. We would go eat and just go to more meetings. It was an eight-month program, but I stayed for a year. When I was around five years clean, I told my sponsor that I would really like to have a degree. I had always thought that I was too dumb to go to college. Being molested and raped made me feel that. All through school, I never raised my hand. The only way I would answer a question was if the teacher would call on me. When other children would raise their hands and answer the question, I’d be sitting there having a conversation in my mind, “Oh, I knew that.” But I would never raise my hand; there was some reason I was afraid. But then I had a light-bulb moment. I said, “I’m going to go to college!” So, I took a placement test. Then, I get this letter in the mail labeled Orientation. Orientation? Now, this is how God works. I got a certificate in human services. The next year I took three classes and got my AAS degree for addiction. So, I went across the stage again. I was just so tickled with myself. I got the President’s Cup for an essay I wrote about my life. I was honored at an awards banquet as part of the National Honor Society. I was just so happy. Here was somebody that never raised her hand, who always thought she was dumb. But I went ahead, and I finished school. Diane Moses came up with this idea of a peer advocacy group to follow patients graduating from First Step to see how they were doing and help them stay on course. She would tell me about jobs and say I should apply for them. Finally, I said, “I’ll do the interview.” A doctor, the supervisor, and Diane took turns asking me questions. Well, how about it…. I got the job. Diane came up with this idea to take what I had been doing and put it in a clinic to help with barriers to care. We were all in this meeting throwing out ideas, writing everything on the wall. The group got all this stuff together, and they came up with community care coordinators. Donnie Missouri was there. He was a counselor at First Step Day Hospital. I also knew him from the fellowship, and he got me my internship. They start bringing in more community care coordinators, and then that name changed to community health workers, CHWs. When I was working for Johns Hopkins HealthCare, they called ten of us into a meeting. I thought they were giving us updates because they were under new management with a whole new CEO. They told us we were being let go as of December 31st, 2019. I was 65 then. It looked like they were letting go of all the CHWs that were the first on the scene. People were asking some really valid questions, the supervisor kept saying, “It is what it is.” That knocked the wind out of me. I felt hurt. I felt betrayed. I’ve been up on a wall at Johns Hopkins HealthCare as Employee of the Month. I was one of the very first CHWs in that the pilot program— before they were even called CHWs. I met Donnie, actually, when I came into recovery. I may have had like 30 days clean. In October, I’ll have 22 years, and Donnie has about 24 years clean. I talk to Donnie every day because he’s my sponsor, too. He has his own business now, helping new treatment facilities. He’s good with holding groups and all. He said I could get my peer specialist certificate at Turnaround Tuesday. Even though a peer specialist does the same thing that a CHW does, it has the addiction component. People are offering me jobs, but I was having a hard time recovering from Hopkins. Turnaround Tuesday helped me with that. They are helping with me to heal. I deal with chronic depression. I had no self-worth; my self-esteem was low. But I listen to God and take His good orderly direction. I’m just taking it one day at a time because I love helping people. We gotta do it in His time, not ours. I’m still a certified CHW. That they couldn’t take, and that has really enriched my life.