The melting globe (sienna, umber)

Damned landlord!... You are the source of all my troubles. It was you who insisted to be portrayed by me to cover the outstanding rent.... now the jury has rejected my paintings saying they were just too ugly! I am sure it wasn't my work they found to be horrible.... it was your face!

Flower observatory

The early morning caller. This person enters your home early in the morning and walks stealthily like a thief. If you wake up, he pretends having entered the wrong apartment, looking for a Mr. Pierre or a Mr. Paul. He is abashed with apologies and retreats after carrying off what has fallen into his hands. This man works around all the hotels, knowing that the travellers have the habit of leaving their key in the door.

The Adoption. - Well, really! Robert, my friend, so you are becoming a family man. You're considering adoption?... You will soon crown the maidens at the village fair... (Robert)- Yes, I adopted this child. I want to thrive in the joys of family life... (Wormspire) - You want to marry your ward... - Yes, I want her to get married. Yes, get her married to a rich man, prepare for my retirement. - Prepare for your retirement... get enough money for old age and win the Monthion prize... I know, I know!

Initiation of a freemason. We know from reliable sources that you are only among us to reveal our secrets to outsiders.... your guiltful projects will be thwarted...... I have received order to drive this dagger into your chest!

Preparing for the baccalaureate. - There are two ways in which you might pass your exams: the first way is to let someone else take your place; the second is to take them yourself. - I would like to take them myself. - Very good!... Do you know Greek? - No. - Latin? - None the more. - Excellent!... Do you know your Math? - Not at all. - What do you know then? - Nothing. - But you've 200 francs? - Of course! - Splendid... You'll be passed next Thursday. - You mean you're going to prepare me in eight days? - What do you think!!!!... It's true that I've taken on the responsibility for your success, but for teaching you... Oh no! Certainly not!!

Here is your account: I owed you 150'000 Francs; I already have given you a downpayment of 100 Francs, plus another 50 Francs later, which makes the total 150 Francs. I now give you another 1'000 Francs, which brings the total to 150'000. Please be so kind to sign that we are even now.

A History Lesson. - What, you don't even know the names of the three sons of Dagobert. You don't know anything at all. Are you really planning to remain for the rest of your life a useless member of society?

How to Become a Great Mathematician. Monsieur Moutonnet, you have made yet another error in your calculations... copy out for me six times the verb: I have made a mistake in my addition! (Mr. Moutonnet, now furious, answers back with some signs, which really have very little in common with algebra)

Robert Macaire at the restaurant. - My God!... By the most appalling error my friend and I forgot to take some money this morning... As you don't have the honor of knowing us, may I offer you as collateral for the 6 francs, 25 centimes we owe you these ten shares of the newspaper La Presse, or perhaps my friend's hat. - I would really prefer your friend's hat!